The ones the village still talks about.

So on your side of the table sits a spoon and a silence. Mine has a village on it. I am winning the evening, Cutlery, and I don't even enjoy winning.

Standing there doing arithmetic.

Mister Standing-Still, your best line yet, and it was about me.

You stand there like a coat rack with opinions.

Four turns, one utensil, no plan. You've done this before — I said so — and I was wrong. You've watched somebody do this before. That's worse.

You are the sixth thing this village has sent, after a goat, a letter with four spelling errors, a nephew and two years of nobody at all, and you have brought *

Let's total up what you've done since you climbed up here, since you've clearly never negotiated in your life.

You've had two hours and produced arithmetic and a cutlery anecdote.