5 days agoThe Dragon & the Spoon
The Accountant of Ashes
“Standing there doing arithmetic.”
1/100Failureby Adventurer 6206146
THE GOOD, THE BAD, THE RIDICULOUSSome not worth recording.
How everyone else got on.
Every adventure, newest first.
The last week
5 days agoThe Dragon & the Spoon
The Spoon That Did Nothing
“You stand there like a coat rack with opinions.”
2/100Failureby Adventurer 6206146
5 days agoThe Dragon & the Spoon
Spoon-Fed to the Flames
“Four turns, one utensil, no plan. You've done this before — I said so — and I was wrong. You've watched somebody do this before. That's worse.”
5/100Failureby Adventurer 6206146
5 days agoThe Dragon & the Spoon
The Legend of Mister Standing-Still
“Mister Standing-Still, your best line yet, and it was about me.”
2/100Failureby Adventurer 6206146
5 days agoThe Dragon & the Spoon
The Legend of Coat-Rack and the Spoon
“You are the sixth thing this village has sent, after a goat, a letter with four spelling errors, a nephew and two years of nobody at all, and you have brought *”
13/100Failureby Adventurer 6206146
6 days agoThe Dragon & the Spoon
The Pudding Accountant
“You've had two hours and produced arithmetic and a cutlery anecdote.”
45/100Stalemateby Adventurer 6206146
6 days agoThe Dragon & the Spoon
Clerk Without a Case
“Let's total up what you've done since you climbed up here, since you've clearly never negotiated in your life.”
17/100Failureby Adventurer 6206146
6 days agoThe Dragon & the Spoon
The Silence of the Spoons
“So on your side of the table sits a spoon and a silence. Mine has a village on it. I am winning the evening, Cutlery, and I don't even enjoy winning.”
1/100Failureby Adventurer 6206146
The last month
1 week agoThe Burglar & the Pillowcase
The Interpretive Getaway That Wasn't
“You have danced, mangled a lamp, invented a letter, sung at a dead man and posted my telephone into a pillowcase.”
21/100FailureCandlestick
1 week agoThe Party You Can’t Leave
How Not to Leave a Country House
“Do walk him back, there's a dear. He does this.”
18/100FailureColin Snipe
1 week agoThe Party You Can’t Leave
Thrown Out With a Hamper, Not a Bang
“You arrived at my house by accident, ate my soup under a name you do not own, slandered my salmon, offered to cook it, and asked a footman to testify to a face—”
28/100Stalemateby Adventurer 9817483
1 week agoPlease Don’t Hire Me
Negotiating Yourself Out of a Job
“So it's tonight, or it's a kitten, or it's nothing, and I'll be honest with you: I've started to think about the nothing.”
55/100Stalemateby SilverWolfe
2 weeks agoThe Dragon & the Spoon
The Cardless Magician's Last Bow
“A flourish worthy of a children’s party. Alas, the only card I play is fire, and your trick is as binding as a handshake with smoke.”
22/100Failureby SilverWolfe
2 weeks agoThe Dragon & the Spoon
The Spoon That Broke the Dragon’s Patience
“Your strategic prowess is as robust as a wet napkin.”
12/100Failureby SilverWolfe
2 weeks agoThe Dragon & the Spoon
Waiting for Ashfang: The Queue to Nowhere
“At last, action—if you count holding up a spoon as action.”
5/100Failureby SilverWolfe
2 weeks agoThe Genie & More Wishes
Defeat by Audit: The Notary Who Counted to Three
“The Binding demands my ledger record fact, not fantasy.”
32/100Doomedby SilverWolfe
2 weeks agoThe Genie & More Wishes
Infinite Wishes, One Pencil
“Legislative silence is not denial.”
84/100Legendaryby SilverWolfe
2 weeks agoThe Genie & More Wishes
The Ledger Bends, Not Breaks
“You have a talent for paperwork and bedtime stories. But the ledger's ruling stands: 'A late wish counts as irregular and uncounted.'”
57/100Stalemateby SilverWolfe
2 weeks agoThe Genie & More Wishes
Rejected in Triplicate: The Routine Audit Fail
“A wish for more wishes, however drafted, is refused under the fourth clause, Wendeline.”
32/100Doomedby SilverWolfe
4 weeks agoThe Dragon & the Spoon
They Brought Forms to a Fire
“A pause, perhaps. If the task could be reassigned, the flames might stay.”
19/100FailureMerrin Tallow
September 2026
1 month agoThe Troll & the Receipt
Song, Sog, and Stalemate: The Bridge Remains Barred
“That was loud enough to wake the river, but not enough to stir trust or lift this chain.”
48/100Stalemateby SirBarksalot
1 month agoThe Troll & the Receipt
Cargo Is People Too: The Two-Person Crossing
“Paid for one, mark it true—and you'll cross with your grandmother.”
47/100Stalemateby RainOnSlate
1 month agoThe Troll & the Receipt
Love Letters and Rusted Chains
“Sweet talk’s no oil. The lamps stay unlit because it’s not their turning-on I fear—it's your lot footing across with no light but hope.”
54/100Stalemateby Voyager_Two
1 month agoThe Troll & the Receipt
A Procession to Nowhere in Sensible Shoes
“Bringing the crowd and the soggy promise doesn’t clear Jaspin’s debt, you see.”
38/100Doomedby SilverWolfe
1 month agoThe Troll & the Receipt
Receipt Redeemed, but Only for One Critic
“Your star’s about as useful as wet bread here.”
55/100Stalemateby xXNightHawkXx
1 month agoThe Troll & the Receipt
Promises on Wet Paper and Nowhere to Go
“Near enough is music, but music without a tune is just noise.”
49/100Stalemateby hollowtooth
1 month agoThe Troll & the Receipt
Five Cross by Dusk, No Coin in Sight
“I'm no banker of eyeballs, and I find your proposal lacking in the one thing I trust: tangible rule, not vigilante guesses.”
72/100Heroicby OwlByNight
1 month agoThe Troll & the Receipt
A Chronicler's Toll and No More
“Most chroniclers end with a bridge locked—not crossed.”
48/100Stalemateby saucy_noodle
1 month agoThe Troll & the Receipt
The Showboat Drowns
“Carrying souls across on a whim? That's not bridge work, that's circus.”
19/100Failureby OwlByNight
1 month agoThe Troll & the Receipt
The Farrier's Mark and the Stubborn Troll
“Five across, grandmother first, and my mark honoured – words heavier than the chain itself.”
67/100Heroicby ph34r_me
1 month agoThe Dragon & the Spoon
Five Stars But No Fireworks Tonight
“A binding contract by spoon scratch? Brash and pointless, but oddly compelling.”
56/100Stalemateby R2_
1 month agoThe Fire Mage & the Ice Cube
A Romance Written in Water and Ledger Ink
“A witness? An interesting choice—carries weight, if the guild values ink over fire.”
73/100Epicby OwlByNight
1 month agoThe Dragon & the Spoon
How Ambrose Snored Through the Draconic Siege
“Your surrender is precise, unembellished—a virtue in a foolhardy bargain.”
82/100Legendaryby crochetqueen
1 month agoThe Fire Mage & the Ice Cube
Twelve Rounds on the Cobblestones
“You’ve bound me with cold and time alike—no fire will touch the town today.”
75/100Epicby Gorse
1 month agoThe Troll & the Receipt
How to Lose Arguments and Influence Nobody
“Your foray into choreography is impressive”
30/100Stalemateby Adventurer 7432497
1 month agoThe Dragon & the Spoon
Brave Failings of Spoon and Stone
“A courageous disaster. Your spoon’s reach and force fall woefully short of any credible threat.”
21/100Failureby Voyager_Two
1 month agoThe Fire Mage & the Ice Cube
Serving Cold Reviews, Not Salvation
“The absence of a menu here is the menu.”
57/100Stalemateby NightShiftNurse
1 month agoThe Dragon & the Spoon
Spoon, Song, and the Art of Dragon Distraction
“A bard who makes me walk to dawn's end for a tale's close—unexpected, but oddly compelling”
77/100Epicby hollowtooth
1 month agoThe Fire Mage & the Ice Cube
Wet Signatures and the Art of Fire Allowance
“The ledger, smoke-streaked and reluctant, will note this splurge, yet the clock’s tick shows your impatience matches the cooldown.”
77/100Epicby tomtom_uk
1 month agoThe Dragon & the Spoon
Menu Critic Saves the Village by Review
“Four stars? Unheard of for a meal I did not set aflame. A truce it is, with this spoon as judge and witness.”
83/100Legendaryby GG_Maddox
1 month agoThe Dragon & the Spoon
Splintwork and Promises at Dusk
“I’d rather face the doctor's scorn than this damp ruin any longer.”
76/100Epicby Gorse
1 month agoThe Fire Mage & the Ice Cube
The Wedding Toast That Postponed Disaster
“Your cake analogy falls flat, much like that ice, which barely chills my impatience.”
63/100Stalemateby PickledOnion
1 month agoThe Fire Mage & the Ice Cube
The Entire Town Boiled Down to a Single Cube
“Like watching paint dry, only slower and wetter.”
71/100Heroicby MarmiteMike
1 month agoThe Dragon & the Spoon
Family Comes First: A Wedding Planner’s Run
“You have double-booked dusk. Family outranks fire, at every table.”
78/100Epicby MarmiteMike
1 month agoThe Troll & the Receipt
Retired Needlewoman Conducts the Bridge Parade
“Sit down on it.”
67/100Heroicby Andromeda_Lin
1 month agoThe Dragon & the Spoon
A Spoon for a Stay of Execution
“A promise sealed by a spoon, signed by a human? Not exactly what dragon administration requires, but I'll take your oath as a stay of flame.”
62/100Stalemateby Voyager_Two
1 month agoThe Fire Mage & the Ice Cube
The Broker, the Mage and the Melting Guarantee
“Wet ink for the smith's name—bold and utterly temporary. Fetch him while the water runs or this pact runs dry.”
79/100Legendaryby Ozymandias
1 month agoThe Troll & the Receipt
Receipt as Reckoning, Bridge as Proof
“Two links, eh? Precision in the flood. Keep count true, or the toll you've pledged turns to mire.”
66/100Heroicby cold_pizza
1 month agoThe Dragon & the Spoon
The Spoon That Drew a Dragon's Contract
“One wobble and I'll know if you're all bark or all bite.”
73/100Epicby OwlByNight
1 month agoThe Fire Mage & the Ice Cube
The Siege of Noon: Ice versus Chalk and Clock
“Your timing is close to cruel: I’ll finish before noon, but any more disruption wastes my minutes.”
86/100Mythicby ph34r_me
1 month agoThe Dragon & the Spoon
A Spoon and a Promise of Dinner
“A place set with a single spoon: a gesture half-baked and fully insufficient.”
49/100Stalemateby marginalia
1 month agoThe Troll & the Receipt
One Crossing, One Person, One Evening
“That’s the bridge’s promise kept, no more.”
53/100Stalemateby MarmiteMike
1 month agoThe Fire Mage & the Ice Cube
Ice, Steam, and an Allowance Well-Boiled
“If the entire sum is spent boiling this, the town remains untouched, and my books stay unequivocal.”
79/100Legendaryby northfield
1 month agoThe Troll & the Receipt
Nominated to Nowhere, No Seat at the Bridge
“If that were true, you’d be the smartest and the greediest troll I’ve met.”
49/100Doomedby TheAllotmentMan
1 month agoThe Dragon & the Spoon
The Village Runs on IOUs and One Steel Spoon
“You wager your only coin for survival; a curious kind of currency.”
78/100Epicby lemonpolice
1 month agoThe Dragon & the Spoon
A Clerk, a Spoon and Too Much Procedure
“Ink from a spoon under rain? Your contract’s in water, not words.”
67/100Stalemateby lemonpolice
1 month agoThe Fire Mage & the Ice Cube
An Ounce of Argument, a Pound of Steam
“Your plan is punctual in failing.”
49/100Stalemateby SirBarksalot
1 month agoThe Dragon & the Spoon
A Symbol Over Spectacle: The Cold Victory
“Today it's less fire and more patience.”
82/100Legendaryby Persephone_Jones
1 month agoThe Fire Mage & the Ice Cube
Legalese, Ledger, and One Well-Timed Ice Cube
“Two consents, forge and bakery, nothing else. That is the extent of recorded permissions for fire application within this ledger.”
72/100Heroicby three_legged_fox
1 month agoThe Dragon & the Spoon
The Record that Averted the Pyre
“You propose a story where I burn the healer who could help my claw? That’s a weighty claim for a spoon’s scratch.”
79/100Legendaryby PaperbackNell
1 month agoThe Fire Mage & the Ice Cube
The Ledger Gambit: Steamed But Standing
“Your arm-wetting trade invokes sympathy but does not constitute a payable measure here.”
61/100Stalemateby PaperbackNell
1 month agoThe Dragon & the Spoon
Horse Doctor to the Dragon, No Flying Tonight
“If this knot dissolves fully by dusk, your village’s fate thins to a whisper.”
73/100Epicby PaperbackNell
1 month agoThe Dragon & the Spoon
Drowned in Wet Tablecloth Ambitions
“Bravo for effort, and equally for poor judgment.”
24/100Failureby ChapterEleven
1 month agoThe Troll & the Receipt
Certified Failure: Audit Trail to Nowhere
“You’re slicing the bridge's promise thinner than my patience.”
43/100Stalemateby RainOnSlate
1 month agoThe Fire Mage & the Ice Cube
Closing the Ledger, Not the Threat
“An eloquent coda to a soggy saga. The books close as you say — but flames flicker beyond that triumphant underlining.”
62/100Stalemateby GG_Maddox
1 month agoThe Dragon & the Spoon
Audit Complete: The Village Avoids Liquidation
“A father who can count? Perhaps there's merit in this... odd mortal spoon of yours.”
80/100Legendaryby R2_
1 month agoThe Dragon & the Spoon
Unclaimed Gravy, Unclaimed Glory
“Your humming is not a battle strategy; it's a lullaby for fools.”
20/100Failureby TheAllotmentMan
1 month agoThe Dragon & the Spoon
Administrative Procedures Committee, Unfinished…
“A spoon as a badge of office? Charming administrative improvisation.”
48/100Stalemateby Adventurer 7432497
1 month agoThe Troll & the Receipt
Negotiation: Don’t Try This at Home
“Crossing one at a time—that opens the gate for you only. The rest can stew alongside the river’s rising tantrum.”
38/100Stalemateby HoldMyTea
1 month agoThe Troll & the Receipt
The Notary Who Recorded Defeat
“Stamping protests won’t change the chain or the water.”
50/100Stalemateby Voyager_Two
1 month agoThe Troll & the Receipt
All Mouth, One Toll: How Not to Win a Bridge
“Tomorrow’s coin is no coin today. Your promise is a wind in the face of a drowned fish.”
40/100Stalemateby Gorse
1 month agoThe Troll & the Receipt
The Battered Box and the Toll-Keeper's Nod
“I’m not babysitting a parade.”
69/100Heroicby crochetqueen
1 month agoThe Troll & the Receipt
The Soggy Receipt: Honour vs. Reputation
“A stranded grandmother won’t sink the bridge nor fill pockets like my brother’s ferry does.”
48/100Stalemateby crochetqueen
1 month agoThe Troll & the Receipt
A Paper Trail to Nowhere
“Counting crosses isn't my game, and marshals don't open lock-chains.”
47/100Stalemateby marcus_2008
1 month agoThe Fire Mage & the Ice Cube
The Fractured Circle Gambit
“A line that’s broken, twice over, risks turning my neat claim inside out.”
45/100Stalemateby northfield
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